Hard to believe that all the noise and mass body milling and microphone wars from last night could be surpassed, but that’s exactly what happened tonight. The whole myriad scene runs like a flash flood, after an unexpected frog strangling rain hits the mountains, smashing into everyone until the senses are completely dulled and it’s hard to comprehend or understand how or why you’re there. Yet ‘there’ is where every one is. Everyone that’s anyone in the poker world is here or coming in…don’t be left out.

I got the easy part of the line-up tonight…started on 21 which was $15-$30 7 Card Stud. A couple of $15-$30, $8-$16, and $4-$8 Holdem Games, and one $80-$160 Holdem. Which was a must move and there was a ‘must, must, move’ also. Then $1-5 and $6-$12 7 Card Stud and one satellite down, and I was out the door, on my way home…I got out almost two hours early and I’m glad. Going back tomorrow for my 6th day…two more weeks of this six day stuff may kill me. 🙂

So-o-o-o-o let me fill in the story of the $30-$60 Holdem game that I was too tired to expound on last night.

About a month ago, I slipped into the box in a $4-$8 Holdem game. The 10s was a tall, well built, black man. He was wearing a white cap that had “Angel” on it. He kept dropping his cards out, away from him, long before the action came to him. Each time the action came to him, I turned to him and waited a few seconds and then stated, “It’s up to you.”

Each time, as he looked off into space, he waved his hand indifferently at the cards. The third time, I turned to him and said, “Please fold your hand in turn.”

He said, “I’m leaving them where you dealt them.”

Another player jumped in and complained that he’d been doing it every time unless he was going to play the hand.

Still looking at the 10s, I said, “No you aren’t. I didn’t deal your cards out there.”

He told me to ‘just deal’. I called for a decision. Suzanne came over and after I explained what happened, she spoke with him for a few minutes and told him how important it was that he fold in turn. She walked away.

We had a new player in the 4s that didn’t know anything about betting or the play of the game and he told me when he sat down that he’d never played before and would need help. He placed a ‘string bet’ and I explained to him that he needed to say raise or set his chips out all at once. He didn’t mind at all. However, the 10s said, “She’s going to bitch at you no matter what you do.”

I looked directly at the 10s with this response, “I run my game. If you don’t like it, pick up your chips and go play someplace else.”

With that said, he elected to play the game. He played almost any 2 cards, tipped me so much it was almost embarrassing and I passed him awhile later between tables. I started laughing when he made eye contact with me and I asked, “What’s your name?”

He told me it was Prince something , but I didn’t catch it all and if I did, I can’t remember it. He shook my hand and I moved to my next game.

Then on Tuesday of this week, he was in the 5s in a $15-$30 Holdem game. When I sat down, he demanded, “Change the deck.”

I grinned and said, “Yes, Sir!”

He called a raise, heads-up and called all bets with a flop that came Q-6-Q. Yup, he made an 8 high straight. He played almost every hand. He’s volatile and proved it a few hands later. He got into a pot with the 9s and after bet, raise, raise, raise, repeat on each street, the 9s made a flush. He slapped the Flop at the 9s, the cards sailed into the 9s’s chips.

Immediately I said, “HEY – hey – hey. You can’t do that or I’ll have to deal you out.”

I looked directly at him and his eyes were hidden behind the infamous dark glasses that players wear to gain an advantage.

He ignored me but I knew he got the message. This time he threw a handful of $1 chips at me, with the statement, “I don’t want them.”

Some them slipped into the rack and I thanked him, rapped them, and put them in my pocket.
I reached across the table and touched his hand for a milisecond, then said, “Come on. Let’s just play poker.”

The 9s knew he had the best of the situation and he never complained.

The 5s was extremely well behaved after that. This time he was wearing a cap with “Poet Elite” on it. I asked him about his “Angel” cap. He said one of his ‘girls’ gave it to him and that it was a lucky hat for him and he won $4,000,000 while wearing it.

The 4s, female, asked him where his ‘girls’ were…he said some of them were here and some of them were back East…Umhhh!!

I got pushed.

On to the $30-$60 Holdem game. He was in the 3s, wearing a plain, boring Nike cap this time. He was gambling and showing them all the bad hands he could and WINNING.

The 5s was an Asian female that plays in the room off and on but I don’t know her name and don’t deal to her often. She was trying to isolate him each time and raised if he came into the hand and re-raised if he raised. She wasn’t faring well against him but she kept trying.

He was wearing the dark glasses and stalling the game a little bit, from time to time, when the action came to him because he knew it irritated all of them. He also picked up extra chips and when he called a raise or a bet, he would cut off the right amount and then twitch his thumb out to the side like he was going to raise, then hesitate, and leave only the original call. He’d showed them everything and no one knew where to put him so they had to play their cards instead of trying to figure where he was and what he was trying to make. He WAS the game though.

Then we come to the part where I got really lippy with the 5s. The bet was raised to the 3s, he raised, the 5s raised…about five way action in the hand, pre-flop. On the Flop, the 1s bet, the 3s raised, the 5s threw her hand away, 7s called. The Turn, the 1s checked, the 3s fired, the 7s and the 1s called. The River, the 1s checked, the 3s fired, the 7s and the 1s called.

The 5s demanded, “I want to see that hand,” pointing at the 3s.

It really didn’t register because the room was exceptionally noisy and the other two players were turning over their hands which had me paying attention to the hand in progress.

“I want to see that hand!” she demanded again, just as the 3s was throwing it into the mucked cards. I did hear her then but his cards were stuck in the edge of the muck and I just pulled them in and out of the way as I pushed the pot to the winner.

She had a fit. “I wanted to see those cards. You were supposed to turn them over.”

I never slowed down with the scramble and starting the next deal. I said, “They went into the muck.”

She said, “No they didn’t. They were laying over here,” she pointed about a foot away from the muck zone, “And you heard me.”

I stood my ground. “They were in the muck and I do not pull cards out of the muck.”

She snarled at me, “They’d better tip you…I’ll remember you…I play every day and I’ll remember you.”

I reached up with my right hand and pulled my name tag out as far as my shirt would let it move, and said directly to her, “Linda! My name is Linda!”

She rallied with, “I’ll remember!”

Still holding my name tag out, I said, “Just to help you out, so you won’t forget, my name is Linda!”

I dealt the next hand with her still ragging about ‘they’d better tip you’ and I said, “If you don’t want to tip, that’s your business. If you have any other problems, take it my supervisor, otherwise, get over it.”

She clammed up. The game rocked. The 3s won a big pot and threw me three chips…yup that’s $10 chips, baby.

Was I protecting him? NO! I was doing my job. I guarantee you that if you’re in a game, he’s the kind of player you want in it and the only time you should ask to see a player’s hand is if you feel there’s collusion in the game…you certainly don’t want to send him to the Cashier’s Window because you’re curious what he’s playing, especially after he’s shown you ATC (any 2 cards) for hours. He was still there jamming when I left at 3 a.m. That guy came to play.

Oh…the 5s? She won a big pot a few hands after my ‘lippy’ burst…she stiffed me…which I expected. But as I left the game, she threw me a tip…that’s what I love about poker. Tempers flare, words fly, but it all blows over…it’s the nature of the game. C U there!

The room was filled with high limit games tonight. Fortunately I missed them. I started in a $30-$60 Holdem game that was held at a 7 Card Stud Table…yes…they were cramped and the game wasn’t even full. They were arguing with the dealer, Marsha, about players being dealt in that had not missed their blind. The Supervisor was called. Long and short of it, I don’t want to get into because I wasn’t there from the beginning, so I started my night in a game of noisy arguing guys…but it worked out. I had them laughing and gambling in just a few minutes and thankfully they were in the mood to do just that.

The tournament was still running out in the pit, three to four tables, a few satellites running for tomorrow’s tournament which is 7 Card Stud, and the room was a screaming mad house of noise, games, players, poker…yipppeee! Let’s hear it for poker.

Johnny World and Gus were playing on table 7 with Jennifer H. and Lyle B. I had to go say “Hi” to them and compliment them on how cool they were in the WPT show on Sunday’s Travel Channel. I gave John a little ribbing about the scene where he had the red bandana tied around his head. He’s fun and always pleasant. Gus had his usual impish grin and a smile that dances across his eyes when he says hello. Sweet!

Layne F. was playing the tournament. Had to give him a hug and ‘Hello’. He’s a high energy, always on the move, ready to dance at any poker table, JAMMER. He must’ve been really dancing because he said he’d just lost $51,000 on a pair of Aces in the tournament. He was in the room when I saw him and that may have been his last hand unless they were on break at that time.

Doyle B. has been playing the last few days. I really wish he’d let me write his life story about poker and his relationship with Chip R. Well…cross my fingers…

So far, from a dealer point of view, the money isn’t as good as when the room’s quiet. Right now we have too many dealers for the games in progress and there’s so much noise and confusion that it’s hard to keep players settled into a game…they’re running out to play satellites and changing games.

Well on to a few tales from the felt:

Last night found me dealing a satellite for today’s tournament. There were 10 stacks of chips at the table and 8 players when I started dealing. The limit was $50-$100. A few of the players were locals but most were tourists. The 8 seat won the 3rd or 4th hand I dealt with A-A. As I pushed the pot to him, he asked, “Do I have to tip you now?”

Everyone sort of tittered and I said, “You never HAVE to tip.”

Someone responded, “You can whenever you want to.”

Soon the absent players showed up and the blinds went up. One player busted out and the 8 seat picked up A-A two more times and won both of them. The third time, he won a big pot that was 3 way action with all the raises pre-flop. It went to heads up on the Turn but he got to raise on each street as his opponent bet into him. As I pushed this pot to him, I said, “Yes! You definitely have to tip me now.”

Everyone laughed except him. He said, “I haven’t won anything yet.”

Me, “Just kidding.”

*********

Last week a youngster named Ramsey was playing the $4-$8 Holdem Games. The first night I dealt to him, he kept folding his hands in front of his cards and chips and obscuring them from everyone’s view. I asked him to push his cards out a little because he might be passed in the action. He did. But I had to ask him another three to four times before he finally started doing it every time.

The following night I dealt to him again. He did exactly the same thing and hid his cards from the table’s view. I asked him again to please make sure we could see his cards so we knew he was in the action.

He responded with, “Someone else yelled at me last night for doing that.”

I started laughing. “It was me and I did not yell. I asked you.”

He got totally apologetic and went on and on about how he didn’t mean yell. This brings a question to my thoughts to which there is never an answer…why is it that if a woman says something to a man, she’s YELLING at him?

So…a few nights later, dealing again to Ramsey, he brought up the fact that we ‘started on the wrong foot’ and that ‘you are my favorite dealer’. Cute!! We didn’t start on the wrong foot and I doubt that I’m his favorite dealer but come to find out, he’s a singer in a band. The band’s name is ‘Structure’ but he wouldn’t sing one, little, teensy note for us…even though we asked him.

*********

The other side of the ‘singing’ thing brings us to Jillian. I have asked Suzie to have it made a house rule that Jillian CAN’T sing at the table when she’s playing poker. So far, no response except a chuckle.

Jillian is in her early 20’s, a Meryl Streep look alike in a softer version, tall, shapely, lean, ready to rock and roll her way through the poker world until she leaves for NY for college in the fall. She’s fun, sparky, arrogant, and goes to war when she has a hand. What’s wrong with that? That damn MP3 player and her loud, off key singing, coupled with the twitch and body jerk, leg cross and uncross kick, bounce into the table with the beat, every time something comes on that she likes. That’s what’s wrong with that.

One night when I was playing in a game, she kicked me at least 15 times as she sang, bounced, chair danced, crossed her leg and uncrossed it, until I finally said, “Damn it! Jillian stop kicking me.”

She stopped, looked at me, and said, “Well my legs are long.”

I replied, “Well mine aren’t exactly short and I’m not kicking you.”

She moved her chair over a few inches and still continued to chortle and gyrate with the music. Don’t you just love it?

I did have a little fun with the singing thing though. One night while dealing to her, she left the table for a cigarette break. The 3s asked, “Why does she only play for a few minutes and then leave the table for an hour?”

When she returned to the game, I told her there was a question as to why she left the table for an hour at a time. She asked, “I do?”

I said, “Well apparently yes. But I told the player that you sing at Light and play poker on your breaks. That seemed to make him happy.”

We’ve laughed over that one several times. What’s Light? Bellagio’s classy nightclub.

The Poker Room is starting to rip apart at the seams. The Bellagio Five Diamond Poker Classic kicks off tomorrow. The original plan was to take two tables out of the 30 table room, bringing it down to 28 tables, and putting those two tables out into the pit area with 12 others which would make up the satellite/tournament area. The room still has 30 tables and 12 have been added in the pit area next to the Sports Book and Poker Room.

Regular players that come in every few months, along with players that haven’t been in the room in over a year are arriving en masse. Along with the players, we also have new dealers hired for the tournament overflow…a lot of those are familiar faces also. The next few months should prove interesting as the WSOP begins right after our tournament We get all of the live action on swing shift. Plus…there are always rumors that the “Shoe” will lose the WSOP.

The WPT aired on Sunday night, the 31st. It was the first tournament filmed and it was filmed at Bellagio. It represents poker in a very glamorous, pleasant atmosphere. Extremely well done with explanations of poker jargon and showing the player’s hole cards and play, it will bring a flood of people that want to learn to play poker. Salute!!!! The more the merrier.

The finale of the WPT’S first year will be the last tournament of The Bellagio Five Diamond Poker Classic, $25,000 buy-in No Limit Holdem, and begins on April 14th, 03. As of this date, there are 47 registered entrants into that tournament. The final table will be taped and added to the WPT televised events.

******

A few fun things from the green felt:

One night in a $30-$60 Holdem game, when A-A bit the dust on the River, the player with the losing hand, said, “Eight times, pocket Aces tonight. Never any good.”

Lee, a friend/player, looked at me and said, “No times pocket Aces, Linda!”

He pointed at his short stack of chips. We both busted up.

******
$15-$30 Holdem, every time his blind got raised, the 6s would look at me, fold, and say, “Pocket Jacks! Never any good, Linda!” We both laughed.

Just before the end of my down, he said the hand I was dealing would be his last hand…he was one out of the blind and it was time to go.

I said, “Don’t get trapped now.”

He looked at his hole cards and raised. We both made eye contact and both laughed.

I said, “Uh-oh!”

He got two callers. The flop was A-?-?…he checked, a bet and a call. He showed me J-J, started laughing as he pitched them, and picked up his chips. I knew that’s what he had when he raised.

The player in the 10s, said, “Wow! He had them in the blind twice before.”

That really made me laugh. No way in hell he would’ve pitched them if he’d had them in the blind.

*****

Steve W. – playing $30-$60 Holdem…he’s a rammer jammer, major chip slammer, blames the dealers for his losses but damn I like him a game…never get a chance to watch paint dry when he’s in there…it’s always action, action, action.

He raised on the button with 7-3 OS. Felice, in the big blind, raised. Steve called heads up. He flopped a 3, bottom pair, and they went to war. She finally gave up and just called after six bets went in.

The turn was a 7. More war.

She checked the River, he bet, and she paid him off. He showed her the hand and she almost choked. She never showed her hand but she told the table that she was putting a $1,000 bounty out on Steve. Anyone in that game, playing during the time she was at the table, she would give $1,000 if they broke him. She was dead serious.

They did a little squabbling back and forth about the other person making comments and needling each other after a beat, then it blew over.

They went to war later in $80-$160. They were still slamming when I left the game so I don’t know the result. The bounty wasn’t in effect after the $30-$60 any way. Would she have paid someone the $1,000? Umhhh!

Steve was playing $4-$8 Holdem tonight…wonder what happened there?

Mr. Good Time was playing $15-$30 Holdem tonight. He laughed, he jammed it, he straddled, he drank, he won lots and lots of pots. He made so much noise that everyone in the room knew he was there, at all times.

Some of the players were laughing with him and some were grim faced and devastated by his run of luck…just hoping he’d stay long enough for it to turn around. As the night progressed, his noise level went up…he was off the scale by about 2:00 a.m.

Something happened in a hand that required a decision. The arguing went on for a few minutes with him getting in his 3c worth and more. It slowed down to a dull roar and the Supervisor walked away only to return immediately because Mr. Good Time was now pointing directly at the 1s telling him he ‘could get fucked’ and a few other things.

Mr. Good time was dealt out and the Supervisor told him to take a walk. Of course you’ve heard of the ‘stadium wave’? Well the ‘applause wave’ started at a table next to his and most of the players in the room joined in as Mr. Good Time left the room. He returned 10 minutes later and racked up his chips…naturally the game broke up right after that.

~~~~~

Jump start your heart if you’re a player in this game. $30-$60 Holdem and the 1s is shoveling chips into the pot with both hands. He wins the last hand of the dealer’s down and gets primed for the next hand. The bet is raised and seven players take the Flop, AD-8C-5C.

A bet and raise find four players seeing the Turn which is an unrelated card. The River is an Ace. The 1s checks and calls when the 5s bets. The 5s turns over A-10C.

The 1s turns to the dealer and indignantly states, “YOU are not welcome here!”

Dealer, that would be me, “I’m not?”

“No! You are not welcome here.”

I reply, “Honey, I have to be here.”

The 1s calls every hand for the next 15 minutes, and wins most of them. One that is fairly spectacular and deserves to be mentioned is as follows:

The 9s raised pre-flop. He’s pretty solid and never gets into a war unless he’s armed.

The 1s and the 4s both call the raise.

The Flop is something like, 9-5-3, with two Spades.

The 9s bets, the other two players call.

The Turn is a 10S. A repeat of the Flop betting action…9s bets, the other two call.

The River is a deuce of Spades. They all check. The 4s shows 2-2 for a set of deuces and the 1s turns over 7-4 OS and wins the pot with a 7 of Spades.

The 9s had a Sweater and the Sweater walked around the table laughing…the 9s didn’t see any humor in any of it. The game…er…ahh…war was on.

The 1s threw away, oh possibly, three hands during that half hour down, slammed, jammed, rammed all the rest of them and even liked me when I left. Imagine that!

~~~~~

Omaha 8 or Better really might be the game of the future…the last two nights have found a full $20-$40 with a Half Kill and a full Must Move game.

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.

Out of town over the weekend and catching up on sleep and a few other things always seems to leave me running on empty when it comes to TIME. No need to waste any more time talking about time so on with the poker world.

$80-$160 Holdem last night. Two $60-$120 Holdem games the night before – the 2nd is a Must Move. A $200-$400 Mixed Game last night that carried over from day shift…Sam G. was in the 8s, being his usual obnoxious self. Drinking wine and having more than his share of the chips definitely puts his mouth into full blown overdrive. This is kind of ‘ugh’ for the dealers because the next few months will find us dealing these kind of games, long, hard, and continuously. There will be so many ‘big’ games throughout the room that we will really cherish the $1-$5 7 Card Stud and $4-$8 Holdem games. The small games have last priority in the room. Tears…heavy sigh!

~~~~~

The ability, or lack of, to reason through poker rule and the reason behind it for some players seems to be impossible. Of course we have to consider the fact that the player is just being a BUTT HEAD, but it’s also possible that they really don’t get it! Get what? Two examples:

1) $4-$8 Holdem. Young, fresh faces. All male. Tao – 6s – is a dealer/player in the room. He plays $4-$8, $15-$30, $30-$60 Holdem and plays more often than deals. He’s an excellent dealer and knows the etiquette and is fine tuned to the ‘dos and don’ts’ of poker.

The 5s is so new to poker that he may know what the best hand is but not likely from what he’s turning over and calling down with. He doesn’t know or understand the blinds, the bet, the limit, or the raising part of it…he just wants to play. Tao is helping him with what the bet is on what street but never instructing him on what to play or how to play. Any idiot that paid attention would know when the 5s is calling down with 8-5 OS and the board is A-K-9-4-2, that the 5s is not getting any help from anyone…and the Super Idiot at the table should love the fact that the 5s is calling down with these hands.

Who’s the Super Idiot? Kevin – 2s – has the unanimous vote for Super Idiot of the year and the next 5 years running, even if you just watched Rounders for the 1st time and know nothing about poker, you would vote for him too.

Kevin wins a huge pot, in which the 5s called with out a pair or a hand that was even related to the board, and in a two or three hand lull, the 5s converses quietly with the Tao. The next hand starts with the Kevin raising and the 5s calling the raise pre-flop. Don’t worry, Kevin looks at Tao and spouts off with, “No helping him during the hand!”

Tao is taken completely off guard by the statement because he has never said a word to anyone after the cards are dealt. He responds, “I’m not helping him.”

“Yes you are! Stop telling him what to do!”

I looked directly at the 2s and state, “He’s not getting any help with the play of the hand.”

“Yes he is. He keeps telling him what to do.”

I replied, “No HE isn’t. No one is helping him.”

Naturally Kevin wins another huge pot which is loaded up with extra chips just because the 5s has no idea what he’s doing.

I asked the 5s if he’s ever played Holdem before. His reply is ‘no’. I asked him if he’s ever played 7 Card Stud before. His reply is ‘no’.

Another hand starts, with mass action again, with the 5s folding. The 1s and the 9s end up heads up and Kevin leans to the 1s and whispers something to him.

Flames here! I bluntly query to the 2s, “What are you doing? You just had a fit with someone else because you thought they were talking during a hand.”

Kevin ignores me but stops talking…he won’t even give me eye contact. The hand finishes and I look directly at him and state, “Conversation during a hand with a player that has cards is not allowed.”

He finally looks at me and asks, “What difference does it make? I didn’t see his hole cards.”

This kid must’ve jumped off of an intergalactic potato boat where they played Indian Poker on their breaks. He really believed that he was right.

I finished up with, “You could be telling him what you threw away or what you think the other player held. The rule is one player to a hand.”

I return to the 5s and ask him if he might be more comfortable playing 7 Card Stud because each player receives individual cards and it’s easier to understand what they can make vs. your own cards. He’s cute and really wants to learn to play but he doesn’t need a bad time while he’s learning, especially not from another player that’s taking his chips.

He leaves the game just before the end of my down…only to find another $4-$8 Holdem game. I pass him on my break and he’s having fun, gave me a big smile and thanks me for the help…he just wants to play poker.

2) Omaha 8 or Better, $20-$40 with a half kill. 4s raises, mass action from half the table. 4s is the Bettor/raiser throughout the hand except on the River which is four way action.

The River, the 4s checks, 6s checks, 1s bets, 2s calls. The 4s holds his cards, opened up in his right hand…right where the 6s can see all four of them.

I tell the 4s that he’s exposing his cards. He says it doesn’t make any difference. I respond with, “Of course it does! The 6s has a hand and hasn’t acted yet.”

The 6s says it doesn’t make any difference.

Wow! Where are these two guys from?

I respond with, “Yes it does! It gives you an advantage and you haven’t acted on your hand yet.”

They both tell me it doesn’t make any difference, the 6s following up with, “I’m not calling anyway.”

I respond, “He doesn’t know that you’re not calling.”

The 4s states that he didn’t open his hand.

I still persist, “Yes you did!”

The 4s says he didn’t open his hand and wants to know what you want him to do.

I give up. “Ok, I’m out of line. Just doing my job!”

No one at the table jumps in to give me any defense and I’m irritated with the ‘I just got a big hand/draw beat and want to show my hand’ mentality. I run into in this situation with no regard to poker etiquette from people that play every day. So go ahead boys…it’s your nightmare.

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.

Sometimes you just want to laugh your butt off when you’re reclining in the dealer’s seat, doing nothing, kicked back and relaxing, feet up…after you make sure everyone knows the cocktail waitress is there, all the bets are called (in turn), you cut off chips for a $100 and push the change to the better/caller and neatly stack the bet (in place) in front of the player, make sure the guy that can’t figure out what his name is or where he lives, knows what the bet is (when he’s asked you every time a bet is placed for the last 15 minutes), listen to the guy that wants a set-up, note that the 10s is pounding you on the arm telling you he wants a seat change, and you’re trying to put up 4th street, still smile and act nonchalant and care free even as the 5s is sending you glare devils (and ready to rip up his cards), and you’re trying to answer tourist questions from the 3s, when the 4s wants you to notify the brush that he wants a table change, and the 8s is folding out of turn, and don’t forget to rake the pot…

Oh hell, there’s nothing to it. Just another eight hours in the sandbox playing with your buddies. Only your the traffic director and you’re in charge of all the toys in play and toy distribution.

Of course, every now and then, you have a little altercation with someone that makes you want to spit, snort, paw the ground, and charge. But instead you parry and dance around their intrusive anger and comments until the situation smoothes out and dies down. One example is Uncle Eddy.

He plays low limit 7 Card Stud, $15-$30 Holdem, $4-$8 Holdem and $8-$16 Holdem. On some days, he’s shining with tales of old, knows lots of players from lots of places and really can be quite entertaining to listen to. Let’s assume that’s when he’s winning because there’s another side to him that gets downright < <((((U-G-L-Y-Y-Y))))>>

You push into an $8-$16 Holdem game. A few friendly faces, a few new faces, and Eddy in the 8s, a woman in the 10s that’s really a novice but she’s trying to learn and even has a friend sitting behind her that had played $30-$60 earlier in the day…anyway that’s what the conversation at the table implied.

The 10s makes a number of calls that cost her most of the chips she has in the rack in front of her and she has a $100 bill underneath it. The bill is laid flat and spreading 3/4’s of the length of the clear, plastic rack and appears to be visible to everyone at the table. Bellagio allows racks on the table and lots of people, in all limits, put $100’s underneath the rack, their chips, their coffee cups, etc. She isn’t doing anything that a 1,000,000 other players haven’t done.

Eddy is short stacked and takes a few flops that end up on Nowhere Avenue. In a charming manner he says, “You might want to tell her she has to make the $100 bill visible,” as he motions to the 10s.

As I shuffle the deck, “It’s visible.”
Eddy loses all the charm he’d ever tried to save and bottle during his life and spouts off with, “Just because you can see it doesn’t mean the other players can see it! It has to be visible to play.”

I act really stupid here. “It’s visible and lots of players put their bills under the rack. But thank you for your help.”

I finish dealing the hand and as the action starts, he begins to harp, “This is the only place in the world you can even have a rack on the table. That’s the stupidest rule I’ve ever seen…” and on and on and on….

As I finish dealing the hand, I turn to the 10s and ask, “Would you mind if we set the bill out a little bit so everyone can see it?”

She replies, “Oh no!”

Very demure and helpful, she slides the bill out so half of it is sticks out from under the rack.

Eddy never even slows down or stops to swallow spit as he rambles on, “I sat in the dealer’s box for 40 years and I never allowed…”

I stop dealing; I open my right hand and hold it out to him and in a firm but calm voice ask, “I’ve already thanked you for your help, she has already moved the bill out to where it’s visible to everyone at the table, what else would you like?”

He stops the ramble immediately and the game goes on without a hitch. See! I dance the dance but I know when it’s time to stop letting them step on my toes.

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.

Jim spoke with Linda last night about my posts on the Omaha 8 or Better game. Seems someone alerted him to the fact that he was written about here…the same someone also felt that it was all negative. Totally fascinating.

Let me write a story – that isn’t true – about a poker game so all of you that think my writing is negative will feel more comfortable and can settle into your little, rosy world where nothing ever happens that you don’t expect and don’t want to see.

The game is $1,000-$2,000 Omaha 8 or Better. There are ten men at the table, complacently, calmly waiting to act in turn, and placing their chips in neat stacks in front of them. When the player in the 2s flopped quad 4’s with a wrap around low draw, made the nut low on the Turn, and got counterfeited on the River by a Wheel Straight Flush, and lost the whole pot, which was so big you couldn’t jump over it, he graciously laid his hand down and with a smile said to the winner, “You deserved to win that hand. What a draw!”

His left eye didn’t twitch or anything. He never flinched or looked at the dealer like he wanted to kill him. Instead, he threw the dealer a $100 tip and said, “You really do a wonderful job. You’re one of the reasons I play this shift.”

The winner was beaming, but not gloating, and gave the dealer $500. “I really appreciate your dealing too.”

Agreement echoed from the other players at the table.

All ten of these men look like they work on Wall Street. They are dressed in suits/sweaters and slacks, with leather, polished dress shoes. Their hair is neatly combed and faces shaved, sporting manicured fingernails and matching shorts and socks. No bad breath or body odor here.

They’re all happy, visiting about the weather, the shows in Vegas, what their wonderful wife had prepared for their evening meal and how sweet she was. Their darling children had already been tucked into bed and were visiting Sandman Land, dreaming of how cool their Daddy was.

A beauty queen walked by the table and a railbird’s mouth fell open. “Holy Jesus! Look at that!”

The 1s looked up and then immediately turned to the railbird, “She couldn’t even come close to my wife. We’ve been married for 15 years and she’s still as lovely and wonderful as the day I first met her.”

The play of the game continued. The 4s had bought four racks and was down to his last $1,000 in chips when a lady approached. She was clad in silk, polished and vamped, every hair in place, impeccable make-up, matching handbag and heels, “Is there a seat open gentlemen?”

All at once, all of the men offered their seats to her. The dealer jumped in to save the day.

“Why don’t I give each of you a card, face up, and the low card will give up the seat?”

“Yes! Perfect!” Came the reply from all of the men.

The 4s held up his hand. “My friends, I really would like to go home and see my wife tonight, so if it won’t bother anyone, I will just go and the Lady can take my seat.”

The words came from everyone. “We want to be fair about it – we can draw.”

But they gave in and the 4s left the game. The lady took a seat and the game continued.

That’s how it is in Fairy Tale Land. Everyone is clean and neat, no one swears, or grumbles, or gets upset, or burps, or farts, or runs out of money because these things just don’t happen. And life is boring so eventually you commit suicide…woops…that doesn’t happen in Fairy Tale Land either does it? Nope, you just have to die a long, suffocating, BORING death.

But in the real world of poker, do you really believe that all the books and stories you read about the big name players tell the truth about what they are really like in the every day grind of the poker arena? If you do, come up for air, Sunshine, or else you’re gonna drown down there.I f you think this is negative, then please…don’t read HERE! If you have never seen any of these previously reported incidents happen, then please continue to play in your Fairy Tale Land. If you don’t like what you read here, REPEAT – REPEAT – REPEAT, don’t read HERE!

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.

$80-$160 Holdem with a Must Move game tonight. The room was fairly quiet but the games are still good. Lots of action and new faces. Maybe they’re practicing for Bellagio’s big tournament that kicks off with satellites on the 31st of this month. What ever the case may be, they are there, armed with chips, and ready to fire. Don’t miss it!

~~~~~

The last post on the Omaha 8 or Better game still needs fleshing out and filling in…to leave it as it is would be almost like kissing your sister when in actuality you wanted that hot, young thing down the street. So…

Jeff started out at the Mirage playing $4-$8 Omaha 8 or Better. It was quite a few years before he moved up to $10-$20. He always wore the same long sleeved, flannel looking shirts and baggy pants and at one point was worried that he was going to be kicked out because some players had complained about his appearance and his play. He solicited all the friendly dealers he could to stand up for him if they were asked about his behavior in the game.

He won consistently for a long period of time and placed in some major tournaments and then one day the cards broke even or karma got him or life turned around or some such nonsense. Now he always makes comments about how long it’s been since he won and how much he’s lost and how other players would go crazy if they ran like he did.

He’s also picked up another little obnoxious habit…when it’s his turn to act and he checks, he puts his whole hand out and does a ‘four fingers meet the thumb’ move like he’s implying someone’s talking too much. It’s extremely exaggerated and looks ridiculous. His speech is always rapid fire and hard to understand if you try to listen to each individual word. And he’s obsessed with food. Needless to say, the Food Slut Fairy has his number.

He always hoarded his pennies and tips a few of us dealers about $3 to $4 a year. It caught up with him recently. He was playing in a $30-$60 Holdem game and one player was all-in. He bet on the River, when it was heads up action for a side pot, and the other player folded. Jeff pitched his hand and the dealer shoved it into the muck before pushing the side pot to Jeff. Jeff had the best hand and would have won both pots but the dealer never gave Jeff a chance to retrieve his hand. The dealer only did his job but he might not have been so hasty if Jeff had ever given him a $1 tip in the last four and half years. This is not a ‘tip justification’ statement nor siding with the dealer or Jeff, just the facts.

Gotta be careful, sometimes when you mess with the bull, you get the horn. Wow! Times up for the day so the story will continue at another time.

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.

Wow! A giant Fuji. Yes, that’s an apple…crisply tantalizing, deliciously flavored, exploding into waves of moist bites that send rapturous pleasure across your taste buds and yahoo sensations to your brain.

Haven’t been there? Never experienced an eating orgasm? Maybe you’re buried in the Poker Grave Yard. That’s where players end up when their body still carries out normal functions but their brain doesn’t know they’re dead yet. Well, you’ll have to decide where you’re at with it, so in the meantime, try taking a bite out of one…if there aren’t any Fugis available, try a Gala.

~~~~

“The game of the future.” Every dealer, in the entire world, has heard that statement for years. Omaha 8 or Better, that’s what they’re talking about. It may be the game of the future but in 15 years not much has changed. Maybe no one told the rest of the poker playing population. Or maybe after hearing the continual squabbling and bickering coming from the Omaha game, they don’t want to join THAT game.

The line-up is always the same. The Pros gather and try to find a fishy. But if a fishy gets in the game, the Pros continue to squabble and moan so the fishy has to have the makings of a Pro to be able to stand the noise and confustication or he’ll be gone in a few hours and the Pros will, once again, be trying to find some meat in the gristle they try to chew from each other’s bones.

The line-up is one of the scariest in the world if you’re a little fishy. There are day players and night players, they work a regular shift. If the day players are there at night, they are S-T-U-C-K…not necessarily gambling…but stuck.

They behave like a big, unhappy family most of the time. Why wouldn’t they? They meet every day, try to beat each other out of a few bucks, and haggle and discuss everything while they share a common denominator – Omaha 8 or Better.

The family: Jeff sits with his clear, plastic box, with numerous compartments, filled with daily, prescription pills in front of him. He’s been around since the early Mirage days and before that, all over in Vegas. He’s always eyeing the chicks that stroll by outside the poker room and tries to snag one if they look in his direction. He brags about his girls, the ones that every one says he has to pay if he wants companionship, and talks about his next meal, who’s going to go for the food, who’s going to buy, and who wants to share a part of the meal. He swears he’s been on a losing streak for at least a year and most of the dealer’s are relieved he’s not winning because he’s what’s classed as a ‘stiff’.

Jimmy, he’s been there since the Mirage days also. He considers himself to be the table captain, the reason the game starts every day, and the reason the game moved from the Mirage to Bellagio…although he never knows where the action is, how many players are in the hand, or ‘what happened’ so a dealer has to have a lot of patience and a deaf right ear because he always sits in the 10 seat and is never quiet.

A. A. or Double A as he’s referred to, is a sweet, kind, gentle person that likes to play and is never abusive to anyone. He’s put up with ribbing from Jeff and other players about how bad he plays and a variety of other comments – for years. He rarely gets involved in the table conversation but when he does, it’s worth listening to.

Jay is a riot. He’s nonstop chatter boxing all the time and it’s usually always directed at Jeff and how poorly Jeff plays any hand from any position. Jeff and Jay have a little love/hate thing going on. When Jay starts in on Jeff, Jeff usually flushes and blurts out with a statement that comes strictly from defense and not from thinking. It’s a comedy…Jay thrusts and parries blow after blow and Jeff reacts like a dancing bear that ate fermented berries. Jay likes to play too, he puts chips in the pot and never flinches or behaves poorly when he’s not winning.

Don goes with one of our dealers and his volume control seems to be stuck on high most of the time but he’s very stable in starting a game and keeping it running. He’s had his wars with Jeff also. That appears to be resolved and history now. Don likes to play Mixed Games but plays Omaha 8 or Better when the Mixed aren’t running.

Bobby also goes with one of our dealers. There are posts about him in the ‘Dear Diary’ and his reply to the posts in the ‘discussion page’. Lots of players have learned to control their attitude and table manners and he appears to be on the upside of good behavior now. He’s been around since the Mirage days also although he didn’t start playing with this group until he moved to Bellagio.

Al’s been around since the early Mirage days also. He’s a rammer jammer at times and is very good for the game from a Dealer’s perspective. Not because he’s such a great tipper, although he tips even when he’s buried if you do your job well, but he’s personable, always says, “Hello!”, never dishes out abuse but definitely won’t take any either. He really knows how to give someone the verbal square needle when they start whining or getting out of line.

Jim, new to the group about eight or nine months ago, likes this game and all others. He’s outspoken, right to the point, came to play poker but not to gamble. He’s not good for the game as in action, action, action, but he’s a stabilizing factor and helps balance out the scales. He feels the reason that Omaha 8 or Better players ‘get to know each other’, (that’s a nice way of saying they argue all the time), is because it takes so long to play a hand.

There are several Pauls that play. One in particular played at the Mirage but he played 7 Card Stud 8 or Better long before he learned to play Omaha. He always tries to bring the dealer into his tormented black hell of poker. It’s personal. The dealer did it. Statements like, “You can really do it can’t you? Well here! Just take the rest of my chips and give them to him.” and a few other inanely stupid comments while he’s glaring at you and shuffling his cards back and forth really endear him to your heart while you’re in the box. You know what he’s going to say before he opens his mouth. Ugh!

Kenny has only been there the last few years. He’s quiet and very seldom ever says anything. If he does, it’s usually terse and harsh if he’s stuck and unhappy.

Doug used to play 7 Card Stud at the Mirage and gradually migrated into the Omaha game. He’s always caustic and grumbling if he says anything at all. He’s a day player and has ‘left the building’ by swing shift unless he’s buried. He’s not someone you look forward to seeing in the game when you arrive, as a player or a dealer.

Rada is the only regular female player. She appears to be distant and distracted most of the time unless she has a real hand. She used to be more light hearted and cheerful but poker has a way of wearing you down.

There are others that enter the picture, some that have been around for a long time but don’t play every day, year round. The family, however, is there, rain or shine, weekends and holidays included. They try to change the rules to suit their situation, they bicker with each other, they go into a cold sweat when a seat opens because they’re afraid there’s no one out there willing to take it, they talk about each other like little gossip mongers, they share meals and each other’s lives.If you can get past all the of the to do about nothing that goes on in the game, they’re mildly entertaining and that’s about all you get out of the game as a dealer because they are hanging onto all their chips. In other words, your pocket is pretty close to dry when you walk away from the table. But hey…look at it this way, thank God you’re not trapped in the player’s seat in that game.

*****
This post is done by Chanzes – during the time period that I took a break from posting in the Diary.