Monday, October 31, 2005

Crumball!! This year’s almost over already – where the hell did it go? Well…having said that, and nothing will change any of it; let’s get on to enjoying the hell out of what we have left of 2005.

The costumes were few and far between for Fright Night. Yes, the usual faces were in the poker room but they weren’t in costume. Marty C. was there and gave me a baleful eye as I walked past him just after I entered the room. I actually snickered as I passed him. He’s joined J.C. Pearson in the Creep Freak Hall of Fame. They are the only two poker players that are now life members of the Creep Freak Hall of Fame. But then it’s my Creep Freak Hall of Fame, I created it and I nominate, vote for, and appoint the members.

I started in a cheery little group of $4-8 H players. Wish that I could have stayed in that game all night, they were fun, gambling, and throwing $$ in my pocket which always makes for a good down.

$8-16 H and $4-8 H, these two games weren’t nearly as much fun as the first one but they weren’t painful.

The next game was $30-60 H. I recognized the guy in the 1s from last week. I asked, “Aren’t you the guy that used to own a casino…?”

He asked, “What?”

I went with it, “You know…you used to own a casino. Until you moved out of your apartment.”

He cracked up. “You thought that was funny?”

I said, “Damn right. I was laughing about it on my days off and as a matter of fact, I’m going to put it in my blog on the Internet and give you credit for it if you’ll give me your name.”

His name is Doug. He informed me I could call him Mr. X. Another player at the table said he looked a lot more like a ‘Doug’ than a ‘Mr. X.’. That was funny too. Well Doug works at Excalibur – poker dealer. Welcome to Bellagio, Doug.

I tried to screw up my line-up by taking a break out of that game. About four minutes later, some bell went off in my head and I raced in to check the break board. Straight to the next game, cruising in as fast as I could get there, I asked the dealer (he’s new), “Don’t you call out no push when the dumb dealer behind you doesn’t show up?”

He said something like he didn’t pay attention to the time; he just kept dealing. Well not only is he new, he’s young, and he looks like he’s never been happy in his life. What’s that all about? How can you not be happy in the poker room? Kee-rist! What are they making these kids of now a days?

This game was $10-20 NLH. Not a lot of action, very little noise, and I was there less than a full down because I screwed up! Slice of pie.

Then I really was on a break. I hit the restroom. As I walked in, a young woman stood right in the entrance with her foot up on the counter, bent over, trying to look at her butt in the mirror. She was definitely in costume and had three other young lovelies with her.

I started laughing as I queried, “Do you have something up your butt?”

Well…the way she was craning and looking in the mirror, I thought she might have lost something there. Apparently she thought she’d torn her fishnet stockings and was looking for the tear, somewhere in her crotch or buttock area. They were laughing, one of them was bending over looking at the fishnet stockings/butt/crotch.

Finally satisfied the stockings were intact; she stood up, looked at my nametag, and asked, “How do you like my balls, Linda? I made them myself.”

She carried two golden globes, each about 10 inches in diameter that had a gold handle that held them together.

Although I had no idea what they were supposed to be, I told her they were great. She said, “See if you can guess what I am supposed to be.”

She reached into one of the balls and pulled out a pinkish, red looking thing on a stick (yes…it resembled a penis). She had on black fishnet stockings, a blackish, short outfit, with something that looked like wings, and she’d already mentioned ‘balls’ so I said the first thing that came to my mind, “A walking Dick Head.”

“No-o-o-o. I’m the condom fairy,” and with that she reached into one of the balls and handed me a condom that had a paper pasted on the side, “Don’t be a ghoul, cover your tool”.

It was too funny. I asked her and her friends if they’d been through the poker room.

“No!”

I asked them if they’d mind walking through. They were fine with it. I took The Condom Fairy and one other one up through the Upper Section with me and I asked the Condom Fairy to give a condom to Nate (he was working the brush). She did. Everyone was watching the chicks…the hell with the costumes.

I left the girls there and continued on my break by heading back to the restroom where the Hallo-weenies had sidetracked me. I left my gift from The Condom Fairy in the restroom…who knows, maybe there’s a guy disguised as a girl drifting through there later in the night.

See…how can you not have fun in the poker room?