Friday, August 26, 2005

Umnhhhnnn! Last night found me going in to work, signing the E/O Play list, finding a seat in $4-8 H for approximately 30 minutes where I managed to lose about $20 in that half hour, and hitting the Time Clock by 8:30. Will this girl ever burn and turn again for a full eight hours? Stay tuned. The saga continues every Monday through Friday.

While I’ve been playing hooky from work, I’ve also been playing online poker. I’ve messed around with live play and tournament play and I’m always amazed at the people that can’t take a beat or get a hair up their ass about the way someone else played a hand. My latest gig is to let them rant for a minute and then type in “whiner”. This recent one is one of my favorites.

I called a minimal raise with A-Q, flop J-10-little, another minimal bet, I called. The Turn was a King. I got paid. Guess I didn’t realize that I was supposed to automatically give him A-K and just throw my hand away when he raised. The chat went like this:

*Begin chat*

bberard34: nice chase retard
PokerWorks: whiner
bberard34: we’ll see b itch
PokerWorks: keep whining
Dealer: Limits going up: blinds 50/100
bberard34: keep chasing

*End chat*

And I won this single table satellite, an entry into this – Sunday # 11247711 – $200+15 guaranteed $500,000 – Sweet! And yes, on this site, my ID is PokerWorks. So nah, nah, nah-nah-nah, bberard34.

But on the following site my ID is IsleofPoker. Pokerwhipped got check raised when a 9 paired the board on the Turn. He hurled his insults at the raiser. No…it wasn’t me.

*Begin chat*

pokerwhipped: WTF
pokerwhipped: U HAVE THAT 9 HUH
pokerwhipped: LAYING ACES DOWN
pokerwhipped: LUCKY SOB
pokerwhipped: GET IM
pokerwhipped: DORK
IsleofPoker: Stop whining
pokerwhipped: WHOS WHINING RETARD
IsleofPoker: Certainly not the person behind you diptard
pokerwhipped: LOL
pokerwhipped: VEGAS
IsleofPoker: St Petersburg
pokerwhipped: MONDAY NIGHT PLAYING $5 BUY IN
IsleofPoker: Point?
IsleofPoker: I’m 9 and I’m playing on my daddy’s account. He won’t miss $5. What’s your excuse?

*End chat*

Pokerwhipped dropped the noise after that.

But on to the whole four hours I dealt last night in live poker at Bellagio. An $8-16 H game – Michelle took the 10s. I hadn’t seen him in at least four years or possibly five…and truthfully I’ve never missed him. He’s a stud player and played for years at The Mirage in the $15-30 and $20-40 games. He moved to Bellagio with us when we opened. He had to leave for the night more than once and a few times he had to leave because he couldn’t get along with me.

How possible you might be asking? It’s sincerely tough to not get along with me if you are doing what you’re supposed to do – that is treating the rest of the world like we are entitled to breathe air too.

For years, when he lost a hand and a woman was dealing, he would demand, “Go home and make a baby!”

It was so ridiculous that it’s funny. He’s Archie Bunker in disguise as a poker player. More than once he told me that when a dealer put up the wrong card – in his country – the dealer’s hand was cut off. My standard retort was always, “Must’ve been awfully hard to fill those vacancies.”

He didn’t get it. He probably still doesn’t get it.

One night – about four years ago – he called a raise, heads-up, with a King up. He was sitting in the 8s and showed me his hand when he looked at it. The way the hand played, Michelle had an Ace in the hole and caught an Ace on Fifth Street. At the same time his opponent caught a Straight. They had a raising war, until Michelle ended up all-in. He was almost drawing completely dead and played the hand like crap but it was – as always – my fault.

He drew his hand back, as if he was going to backhand me in the face. I glared at him and quietly said, “Don’t even think about it.”

He told me to shut up and deal, or some such nonsense, and I called the Floor Person. Michelle had to report into the office and after the discussion in there, had to take all his little chippies and go home for the night.

We spoke when he took a seat in the $8-16 game. He was waiting for a seat in $20-40 Stud. He had been out of the country for almost three years. He’s lost weight. I wonder if his attitude will change towards dealers but I never wonder too long. The answer is usually evident in a very short time. Seeing someone like that always brings up forgotten thoughts…sometimes best left forgotten.