The life of a dealer ain’t all bad. Just think of all of the people you meet, from all over the world, while you’re sitting on your butt, out of the heat and cold, and you get paid for it too. Of course you have to take into account that some of these people are lunatics and some of them are into reality, then add the factor that some of them that are into reality really lose it and become lunatics after they’ve been on a losing streak; the lunatics never step into reality so subtract that factor and there you have it…gamble, gamble, gamble.

My start in the line-up was ‘home’, the high limit. Seems that for some reason, even though it’s a random draw, out of 30 tables and 40 some odd dealers, I always end up in the high limit section. Not to worry, that’s exactly where I was tonight. I started on table 3, $75-$150 Omaha 8 or Better with a 1/4 Kill. They were fairly sensible and easy to get along with.
Next game $30-$60 Holdem, take a break, come back to another $30-$60 Holdem game that was short handed and broke down about 10 minutes into my down. Dead spread the rest of that down and move into a short handed $6-$12 Omaha 8 or Better with a half kill…they all warned each other that the first hand I dealt would be the last hand. I dealt it, everyone folded, the two blinds chopped and away they went.

After 10 minutes or so, my supervisor came over and told me take Ray out of 26, Ray was on overtime and going home. Yahoo! This put me right back in line to hit the high limit games in a few hours…right back up to ‘home’. Shit!!!

Imagine my surprise when I pushed Ray out of 26 and a few minutes later he was going into 14. I would have liked to go to 14, all the easy games were in that line-up, like $15-$30 7 Card Stud and $15-$30 Holdem. What the hell was going on there? I have no idea but I got the dealer bad beat. Mine is not to question why…like hell it isn’t but sometimes you’re just better off to shut up and deal so I did.

I did have a hell of a good time with the boys playing $1-5 7 Card Stud on Table 28. They laughed and whooped, hooted and cheered, teased each other and me, and I made money too. Good thing I got to laugh it up here because the rest of the night was…well, it was funny but I just couldn’t laugh out loud.

When I hit Table 1, it was $500-$1000 Mixed Games. Danny D. was in the 1s and NOT HAPPY! Curtis was in the 8s and even more UNHAPPY! They were playing Deuce to 7 Triple Draw when I came into the game and the next game was Omaha 8 or Better. Nothing really spectacular happened other than I had to dodge a few cards now and then and Curtis talked through most of my down. He flopped a set in two different hands in the Omaha and lost both of them. He took it pretty well but his fuse was ready to blow. He made the comment, repeated it actually, that if he wasn’t playing in a casino, he’d be carrying a gun because he’d swear he was being cheated.

Table One has the Shuffle Master on it and even if I shuffled the deck, I don’t know how, never learned, could give a damn about cheating because it isn’t my bag, so ask me how I liked this statement…meet me for a drink sometime and I’ll tell you.

I remember Curtis from years ago at the Mirage. He ran over the 7 Card Stud game, $75-$150, $150-$300, and had such a great time when he played. In those days, he said that whenever he needed money, he’d always get it playing poker. Good Lord, how time changes everything.

My next game was $400-$800 7 Card Stud. It was insane. Vasili Lazarou was behaving as if someone was taking his eye out with a spoon. It’s really difficult to have a fit with him when you’re dealing to him because even though a logger would pale at Vasili’s nonstop swearing, if I looked at him and asked, “You aren’t talking about me are you?”

He’d say, “Oh no, honey! I’m just mad at the cards.”

Well he had a hell of a lot of mad going on. The only person that wasn’t saying ‘fuck this’ and ‘fuck that’ was Mimi in the 2s. A censor could never keep up with these guys and their usage of the word fuck.

Vasili ended up winning four to five hands in a row, towards the end of my down, and when he beat the hell out of the 4s in a huge pot, the 4s said, “Nice hand.”

Vasili went into a drama scene about, “…you don’t know how much I lost, you don’t know what happened when I first sat down…”

Vasili can’t even take a simple statement for what it’s worth. A little lesson in poker psyche here…pay attention now!

Next game? Right back into the $75-$150 Omaha 8 or Better with a 1/4 kill. It was fairly easy and Joe had me laughing.

My last game was a repeater also, $30-$60 Holdem. The 8s in this game was a young guy, nice looking, so polite it was almost scary, he was there when I went through the game the 1st time. When I returned, he said he would definitely play through my down because I was such a good dealer. Little did he know that I’m a stone bitch and make mistakes just like everyone else but it was nice to hear.

If he bounced a card or a chip, he apologized. He reminded of a kid that grew up in a world where everyone told the truth and no one ever tried to take advantage of anyone. Right at the end of my down, he was heads up with the nut straight…it took a 7 to make a straight, the board was 5-6-8-9-3. He bet and told the other guy, “If you don’t have the nut straight, don’t call.”

The other guy called with a 7, the 8s showed a 10-7. The 8s tried to give the other guy back his last call of $60…he tried three or four times…finally the other guy took $20 of it for his small blind.

Excuse me here, all you pros and sharks, but when I left the box, I walked around behind the 8s and quietly said, “I don’t want to tell you how to play your game but don’t try to do anyone any favors by telling them what you have or giving them back a bet because they won’t do it for you.”

He thanked me and I went on my way.

If you think I’m out of line, I really don’t give a damn, I hate to see a lamb staked out for bait.