you hook him up! I read that quote on the net when I got my first computer in ’96. I loved it then, I love it even more now.

Those teensy figures you see? They are the sweet boy Riot and I. He’s thinking, “What the heck are we doing here, Grandma? M-Elmo is waiting at home and we can never get there if we have to haul that behind us.”

I just shushed his fears and told him we’d be home soon to the Cookie Monster AKA M-Elmo.

All this happened on Friday. I did the ‘walk through’, managed to download enough info into my sleep deprived grey cells to get by until I can read all the manuals on a ‘need to know basis’, backed that big truck right up to the hitch ramp – LOCK AND LOAD, Baby. I was test-driving around Wheeler’s lot with Tracy as my co-pilot as we tested the brakes on the 5th wheel to see if they were pushing the truck or behaving as they were supposed to. It was around 1 PM before I had all the paper work signed, little necessary extras purchased, my family loaded, and I was screaming down the freeway for 95 North to Reno and Tonopah. The Silver Steed just stuck its face into the ‘tow haul’ gear and away we went. I couldn’t believe how well the mouse…er…ah…Steed handled with that house on behind. Unreal.

When I hit the section of Vegas I call home, I managed to run over two curbs with the 5th wheel. My son helped me out there by telling me how to pull straight ahead for about five feet and then turning so the 5th wheel could come into the turn. Hey…I’m a first timer full timer. In the Poker World I’d be known as a fish…what the hell does that make me in RVing terminology? I practiced driving the small streets in my section and headed for home. My neighbor has a big pine that stretches out into the street. I steered around it. My son chided me, “Come on, Mom. You’re going to have to hit some branches with this…”

I parked, we unhitched and cranked down the stabilizers and threw the chocks in front of the wheels. I was exhausted. I took Darian and family (Riot and mom) home and returned for a nap. It was colder than hell.

Saturday – I promised I would jump up, hook up, and take the ‘coach’ out for a pull around the neighborhood. It was too damn cold. I shivered through the wind and cold just to do a few things outside and waited for the guys that installed the Internet satellite, data storm through Motostat, on the top of the coach. It took a few hours and more than several thousand $$$ to get it done. It’s the only system around that practically guarantees Internet, no matter where you are in the U.S. and parts of Canada and Mexico.

Somewhere, somehow, I agreed to allow someone that was interested in this system to come over and connect off of the network before my user ID was assigned. This was to assist the company doing my install and satellite purchase in selling to another customer. I don’t mind but the ‘possibles’ were late. It took an extra 45 minutes to finalize my deal because of these people. Ugh!!!

Now it was definitely too cold and I was too tired to go through the process of hooking up and heading out onto the streets.

On Sunday I got up – early. I did the hook up and went for a ‘tow’. I hit the parking lot of the Suncoast Casino, picking a totally empty section so I could practice backing up, and immediately got tagged by security. He acted like I was trying to do an overnighter when it was 9 AM. I told him I wouldn’t be there long, I just wanted to practice backing up. He said OK and visited for a bit. Damned if snowflakes didn’t manage to drift in from somewhere. Kee-rist! Vickie must be sending them down from Montana.

I made a few feeble back up attempts, drove to my son’s house, parked and visited with him, and then headed for home. That damn pine tree at my neighbors…I broke off a big limb by driving the coach straight into/under it. I’m blaming that on my son, for taunting me about branches the day before.

Don’t worry, the woman that lives in the house with the pine came home about 15 minutes after it happened. She immediately came over to talk to me about it. WTF! I was going to clean up the pine needle/pine cone/dead brown needle mess in the street and saw down the bough that broke…and why the hell hasn’t the city told her that she can’t have the low overhang out into the street? We got through it. I called my son. He came over and took down the broken bough and helped me load up the mess on the street and climbed up on top of the ‘coach’ and swept all the pine needles off of it. No damage. Whew!!!

It really wasn’t as bad as it sounds. There are a zillion old dead, brown needles that lay in the boughs, and pinecones that forgot to fall off when they matured. Of course everything falls off when the coach slams into it. It appeared to be worse than it was.

I learned my lesson. Never drive into or close to any branches. And never…ever…listen to your children. They never listen to you, so return the favor.