Damn the wind! Not only was it windy as hell, it was cold. Within a few short hours, I’d be kicking open my garage door to let the world in – people would be browsing my little collection of life and picking through it, squabbling over prices, and me? I wasn’t really ready for any of it. I wanted my bed – snuggling under a down comforter, my room – quietly tucked away from the rest of the world, but instead I was dialing my son, Darian, to make sure he was up and would be over soon to help me fade through the melee of noise and confusion.

Darian arrived with his son, Riot, and my nephew, Chad. A few minutes later Gordon arrived (long time friend from MT that lives in Vegas, and he and his wife, Carole, were setting up some of their own ‘yard sale’). Darian, Chad, and Riot raced off to a casino to get small change for paying customers and Gordon and I settled in to have a cup of coffee and visit – one last break before it all started.

The sale was set to go at 9 a.m. and at 7:50 my doorbell rang. I looked at Gordon as I went to answer the door. A perky gent asked, “You haven’t cancelled your sale due to bad weather have you?”

“No. It starts at 9 a.m.”

“You don’t have any old casino items do you?”

“Nope, sure don’t.”

He left. I closed the door. To Gordon, “Guess he didn’t read the part of the ad that stated NO EARLY BIRDS.”

Like hell he didn’t. It irritated me. At 8:10, Gordon and me opened the garage, set out a tarp and began loading camping equipment, exercise gear, lawn furniture and more onto it. People started pulling up and stopping. I told two of them that we didn’t start until 9. One of them grumbled that the ad said 8. I said, “Sorry, it’s 9.”

Like hell the ad said 8. These people were on my nerves already and we weren’t even set up. My son arrived with nephew, baby, and change. By 8:30 there were so many people coming into the garage that I gave up. I whispered to my son that I didn’t think I could stand it. His reply, “Ok. Just go somewhere for the day, Mom.”

I handed him the money and milled around, mainly holding the baby, and trying to stay out of the way of the mad rush. Several times I took Riot into the house and just played with him. The wind was still unbearable and while the garage helped slow it down a bit, it was brutal. By 9:10, I felt like the sale had been going on for hours.

At one point I was asked to show a guy how to ride my Trikke…it was for sale. I’d guess he was around 35. After watching me, he declared that that was way too much exercise for what he wanted. Funny. Guess it was supposed to just levitate and spin by itself. Later in the afternoon, a guy about my age (and no, Ten Mile, not elderly), and in much worse shape than the first guy, wanted to know how the Trikke worked. I hit the street again, showing him the leg motion and handle chop to ride uphill. He was interested. I warned him that it took a lot of work to get to where he could do what I just did and that he could get hurt on it. Hell…that must have been the magic he was waiting to hear. He bought it.

About 1 p.m. everything slowed down. Viv had arrived, Carole showed up, Sly (Riot’s mama) came and picked up Riot. I prodded Darian to bring the chimenea from the back yard and put it in the driveway. I cranked up a fire, opened a beer, and parked my tush on a lawn chair while the wind whipped around and blew smoke up everyone’s nose. At that point I really could have cared less. A few people straggled in and several of them wanted to know if the chimenea was for sale. A few that had been by earlier in the morning came back but by 3 p.m. I was done. It was only getting colder. The wind refused to slow down.

Darian and Chad left. Gordon had to go somewhere. Viv, Carole, and me hid in the house with a hot pot of coffee. When a few more people came by, Viv went out to talk to them and eventually Carole went out to help her. I refused to move. I was comatose…cold and tired…and wished I’d just set everything in the street and given it away.

At 4 p.m. Zig came by for Viv, Gordon and Carole started loading up what they had left on the street, I shivered all the way through helping them and when they drove off, I locked my gate, shut myself in my bedroom and jumped on the Migun. Incredible. Then I was off to Sand Woman Land.

I woke up at 11 p.m. and had this hair brained idea that I wanted to drive up to Mt. Charleston, to the old lodge, and have a Bailey’s & Coffee. I cranked up the Silver Steed and hit the highway. I checked the outside temperature when I hit the lodge, 16 degrees. Kee-rist! And to make matters worse, the lodge was closed. It used to be open 24 hours a day and now, by 12:30 a.m. – they were shut down on a Saturday night. Sad. There are a bunch of cabins right by the lodge, rentals, and there was a car in front of every one of them. Go figure! No one drinks at night in the mountains anymore. Just us fish that live in the desert. I headed for home. BTW – it was 44 degrees at my house. S-h-i-v-e-r

Sunday I visited Camping World. There are items to be purchased for the Fifth Wheel, like a washer/dryer, generator, and a satellite for Internet connectivity. And I made an appointment to have the hitch installed in the truck. Lots of things still have to be done before the plan is complete.

On Sunday night I went to Bellagio to find my friend, Christoph. He was in town for a backgammon tournament and we had planned a hike but between his being in the tournament to the final day, and my crazy schedule, we couldn’t arrange a time. So we settled on dinner. He was playing in the $300-600 Mixed game when I arrived.

The room was a screamer. All the tables were open and running and people everywhere. I visited with Carmen while Christoph played the round. Christoph and me headed for Fix. We were starving and it was the easiest and fastest place to get into consider neither of us was ‘dressed’. The company was great, the food was wonderful but the damn music was so loud it was close to more annoying than the wind on Saturday. We had to yell all the way through the meal to catch up on each other’s lives. We finished our meal and headed back to the room. BTW he is one of the best friends anyone could ever hope to have. I love this man.

I escaped the noise of the poker room and headed for the parking garage and my Silver Steed. I was ready for my little, quite slice of heaven. So ended my weekend of the ‘dreaded garage sale’. Kee-rist! I hope to NEVER have another one.