Kim AKA The Dragon Lady. She’s such a character. She acts like she’s mad all the time…and she’s dirt talked to Marty ($40-80 7 Card Stud) so she’s got to be on the top of the list…mine anyway. She goes from being shy and cute to mean and horrible in a zillionth of a second.

She was in my line-up. Recently she trashed me because I said ‘hello’ to her when I sat down. Hey…don’t you know that’s unlucky as hell???? What’s wrong with me that I wouldn’t know that? So…when I slid my tush into the Box, I never even looked at her. She was in the 4s, right across from me, and I still made sure I never gave her eye contact. I wanted to bust out laughing…

The game was short handed, Nick, one of the Greeks, that I had problems with about two months ago was playing. He didn’t last too long. We’ve gotten past the screamer stage where he was pissed because I wouldn’t let him buy short. He finally picked up his chips and left with the statement that he couldn’t beat anyone.

A graciously, wonderful black man was in the 6s. He had a great sense of humor and seemed to be in awe of Kim and her mouth. Kim moved to the 1s when it opened and the 6s took her spot in the 4s.

Kim kept expounding over the fact that she hadn’t won a hand in the last four dealers. OMG! In two hours? Kee-rist! I’ve gone for weeks and never won a fucking pot and I’m listening to her rant, double rant, jam it up rant, pack it down rant, and just nodding my head every time she looks at me after slamming out an emphatic statement on how bad she’s running.

She kept snipping her three cards in, one up, two down, because she’s too damn lazy or irritated to turn them down and push them in. She made a comment when she was low. I chuckled and said, “I love you.”

She croaked, “I love you out my ass,” as she leaned onto her left cheek and pointed to her tush with her right hand.

I roared. Bill – 3s said, “She doesn’t like anyone.”

I argued, “Of course she does. She loves me.”

She slammed and snorted through a few hands, once she raised her hand like she was going to slap me. I laughed. The 4s’s mouth fell open and he almost jerked back. I spoke to directly to him; “She doesn’t mean anything by it. She loves me.”

She won a few pots. Then she had two blues chips in front of her for her ante and told me to give her one. If she won, I’d get it back, if not…forget it!

I dug into my pocket and put out a chip to complete her ante. She never played the hand. A few minutes later she threw in a $5 chip and asked for change, gave me back the one I’d given her, waited a half a minute and threw me another one.

I was still laughing when I got pushed. I walked around behind the 4s and told him she was just a softy and that one time she had said she would fucking kill me and I told her she couldn’t kill a grandma. He started laughing.

Kim was eagle eyeing both of us and listening. She asked, “Grandma?”

I held up five fingers as I turned to my next game. See…she’s got a heart and it ain’t made of stone. You just have to know how to find the map into that heart.

Another part of the equation that’s funny, I used to play $3-6 H with her beau, Bill, at The Mirage – that was long before he hooked up with Kim. Bill plays $30-60 H now and he was an assistant prosecutor in L.A. Not sure what he does now. *Kim is in the People in Poker pages*

*****

How many Elaine’s does it take to stop the whole room? Just one sort of throws a glitch into everything. She’s Asian, used to play $20-40 Omaha 8 or B with a Kill, now plays $30-60 H and the $40-80 Mixed games. And I’ve heard that she used to deal at the Palms. No news on if she works anywhere now. The only problem is that is she does work in the gaming industry, she should be cautioned because of her bad behavior in other casinos.

I was dealing a game with my back to the Cashier when my game and the whole room was interrupted with an incredible amount of screaming behind me. I turned around to see Elaine screaming at Menchie and Menchie slamming out of the Cashier’s Cage.

I went back to my game. The whole room had stopped for a few seconds. People in my game were buzzing about what had happened and why. The word around the room later was that Elaine apparently can’t stand to have old and new bills mixed so when she cashed out, she found five $100 bills in her otherwise ‘all new bills’. She threw them on the counter and wanted to change them for new. Done deal. Menchie, one of our long time cashiers changed them for her. Don’cha just know that Elaine happened to find another one and wanted to change it too. Can’t happen. The cashiers are only allowed to change $500 max in cash for cash.

Elaine was having a fit. Kamell spoke with her about the rule and explained Menchie’s position.

Instead of trading the bill off with another player, or walking to the main cage to swap it out, or just letting it go, she went back to Menchie with the bill and wanted to buy a $100 chip. Menchie sold it to her. Then she immediately wanted to cash it out. Menchie gave her back the same bill. Elaine went nutzzz screaming, “Do you want to fight me? Do you want to fight me?”

I heard that Menchie simply said, “Ok!” and headed out of the cage where she was promptly stopped and herded back towards the office by Skip.

Elaine had to leave the premises and could not return until she spoke with Doug. Naughty, naughty, Elaine, shame on you…someone that’s worked in a casino, especially in the poker room should know better.

And on the other side of it, my money’s on Menchie!