Dealer Doink! I hit the $20-$40 Omaha 8 or Better with a 1/2 Kill along about 2 a.m. The usual suspects with a couple of new faces. Kimiko was in the 9s and Doug C. in the 10s. From the look on their faces and the chips in front of them, they hadn’t won a pot in so long they thought they were there because the family had called a meeting. Double A was in the 8s with about the same amount of chips as the 9 and 10s, but he wasn’t making any noise. Kimiko, however, made enough noise for the whole room. She harped at me, “Come on, Linda! You haven’t dealt me a winner in five years.”

I replied with something like, “Kimiko, you know that’s not true.”

She changed her story to the time frame of the last five months and I have to agree with her, it’s been a while. I rarely pay attention to any of that because I might not deal to someone for three or four months so…of course I haven’t pushed them a pot.

The 1s had some $100 chips, a $1,000 chip, and an odd assortment of $1, $5, and $10 chips. The $10 chips are the dominant chip in the game. He played almost every hand and had gone through the $100 chips leaving only the $1,000 chip. A woman came to talk to him and I got the impression that he was leaving soon, possibly when his blinds came around. Silly me. I should have asked him if he wanted chips but I let it slide and that’s the reason for the ‘dealer doink’.

Kimiko had a steady stream of expletives, including a few ‘fuck this’ and ‘fuck that’ kind of thing, then a phone call from/to her boyfriend on the cell, then she had a headache and wanted to take her blood pressure.

Jeff P. was in the game and she demanded that he pass his blood pressure cuff down to her. He did. She took her blood pressure but first stated she didn’t know how to use Jeff’s machine, she had one of her own that was different, and Jeff informed her that Double A would help her with it. Then she did a ‘OUCH!’ thing when it tightened on her arm and I laughingly told Jeff that he’d get sued. That turned into another conversation. When she was finished, her blood pressure was way to high, the question ‘did you take your pill’ came up, she held the blood pressure cuff up over the table until I took it and passed it down to Jeff in the 4s.

Somewhere about half way through my down, in all the noise and babble, the 1s called with a $1,000 chip. I marked up what he owed the pot by placing four $10 chips on the $1,000. It ended up being Al N. and Kimiko and Al got half the low and all of the high. I called for player’s chips and tried to explain to Al, over all the noise Kimiko was making, that the 1s had chips on the way and he owed $40.

This is where the dealer ‘doink’ comes in. I pulled the four $10 chips, that were marked up on the $1,000 chip, into the pot, split the pot in half and took four $10 chips from the stack for the high half and put them on the low half, and pushed Al the high half. I then split the low half between Al and Kimiko and by now Al was aware that he was getting $40 more when the 1s had his chips.

Jay was in the 5s and he started trying to explain to me that I made a mistake, I didn’t believe him at that moment and neither did anyone at the table. I dealt the next hand before I realized he was right. I cost Al one $10 chip. I agreed with Jay and stated that I had made a mistake. Still some of the players argued that Jay was wrong, which meant that now I was double wrong…if that makes sense…for agreeing with Jay.

Jay was trying to show the other players, by using two stacks of his own chips, how the mistake had been made, they kept arguing with Jay; his conversation implied they were a bunch of no brainers.

Kimiko asked if she got shorted in her half of the pot and continued with a ramble about how much she was stuck; the 3s still argued with Jay; Doug asked if we could keep bringing it up and talking about it forever, and on and on it went, jumbled conversation, better known as ear pollution.

Al said he didn’t care after I told him I’d call the Floor Supervisor and get it straightened out. Al was the coolest of cool about the whole thing. He’s the one that lost $10 over the ‘dealer doink’ and never even flinched. I asked him if I had to bring him croissants, donuts, or whatever to make up for the $10 and he just laughingly told me to ‘have a good night’ when I got pushed. Edited: I believed that I had given Kimiko two extra $10 chips. Thanks to my friend, Than, beating me in the face until I finally got it right, I gave her an extra $10 chip…sorry Al, fewer croissants and donuts, etc.

Incidentally, Kimiko and Doug were looking for the push and the next dealer long before it was time…they even brought it up, like ‘get her out of here’.

Hey, just another segment that builds the little microcosm of society and keeps the family structure together…

*****
I was part of this project. Sweet!
Howard Lederer’s ‘Secrets of No Limit Holdem’