What’s a pennis?

Hell if I know, it was the subject of an email I received today, which I didn’t bother opening. I also get emails that tell me there are big, beautiful women waiting to meet me, and there are women within a few miles from where I live. No SHIT? I hope so. It would be strange to be totally surrounded by men. I started using Thunderbird for my email client abouta yearago. By making a mistake, I made a major discovery that works well for me. As I was setting up ‘message’ filters, I accidentally typed something into the filter that sent all of my incoming email into the Trash folder. Since I receive about 200 emails a day and most of it’s crapola, I found it was easier to skim through the trash, then set a new message filter for someone that I wanted to keep in my inbox, and just empty the trash when I see nothing that looks like it’s from someone I want to read. But that doesn’t change the fact that I have to put up with spam. I hate spammers. And they can take their damn pennis and shove it somewhere in their own oriFACE.

Continuing the obnoxious thread of life, this one happened to me this week, I was traveling South on Arville, first vehicle in the left hand turn lane at Tropicana, to head East for home. In the Tropicana crosswalk (that I would turn across once I went through the intersection) and heading the same direction as me, I watched a dad with a boy that was about five years old, straggle across Tropicana – followed by a mom – followed by a little girl that appeared to be about four and had a fistful of balloons. The whole thing is kind of sick because the traffice was 5 p.m. time and massive, cars stacked back for weeks, waiting for lights to change, and the kids were kind of free rolling on their own. Their’don’t walk’ light had quit flashing a long time ago and turned to a solid glare. My left hand turn arrow hit green and the mom was in the middle of the traffic lane heading East and the little girl was behind her by about five feet, even with the median, I pulled forward into the intersection and sat there waiting (silver steed in action *BFT*), three cards pulled up right behind me, and someone back about five to six car lengths honked impatiently.

Suddenly mom woke up, she turned around and ran back to grab her girl, made the sidewalk, set the girl down, and then turned to me, screaming as she flipped me off, “FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING CUNT! FUCK YOU!”

I almost fell out of my seat belt. She was totally out of line in leaving her child unattended in the cross walk and then behaving like that in front of her children, not to mention that that’s how people get shot in today’s world of road rage and stress.

As I eased forward and got even with her, I rolled down my window and yelled back, “HEY!!! IT WASN’T ME!”

I got the same result, flipping me off, she continued with, “YOU FUCKING CUNT! FUCK YOU!”

Oh well, have a nice day sweetie; hope your kids survive your bad mom attitude and lack of proper supervision.

Another obnoxious thread – people I work with could get on my nerves but I refuse to let them, instead, I find myself laughing my ass off at the rut they’ve dug themselves into. I arrived at work last night, in very good humor, I’d already started the dance with Secret Imp and was heading directly for the E/O Play list. The day shift phone person, Rose, was standing impatiently, glaring across the room, looking through me, around me, and over my head, searching for her replacement. Rose was going home for the day. I cheerily signed the list and asked, “Hi Rose. How are you?”

“Waiting to get out of here!” she grumped at me.

I immediately replied, “Isn’t that how we spend our lives?”

“It’s easy for you guys, you can always get out early,” snarling at me.

I did take the time to explain that I meant ‘we’ as in general and that most people were always waiting for their lives to disappear so they could do something else that bores them to death, but itfell on deaf ears. She never looked at me and continued to glare around the room. I left. I try not to hang out with people that don’t have a clue and are so angry that if a clue hit them between the eyes, they couldn’t grasp it.

It didn’t stop there however.

I found out I had to hop in the box at 7 p.m.and would probably be out to play or leave around 8 p.m. I put on the necessary apron, name tag, etc., and got ready. Starting at table 18, $40-80 Mixed. A little follow-up on this game will come in another post because it’s not in the ‘obnoxious thread’. The dealer I tapped out of this table is a day shift dealer, I don’t even know her name, and she was also the dealer in the next game I was pushing. Table 19, 20, 21, and 22 sit so close together, in parallel fashion, that it’s almost impossible to move between the tables when they are full. As a dealer, you almost have to ask the player in the 1 or 10s to move to allow you to get in and out of the box. I did walk as close as possible to her, leaning over the 1s in her game and the back of the player in the 5s in table 20, to loudly announce, “NEXT HAND!”

A cocktail waitress approached with a full tray, to serve the 1s in table 19, and I backed up against the glass door going into Bobby’s Room, waiting for the hand to end and the dealer to vacate the box. I was standing, between the two tables, six feet max from the dealer, looking at her when she pushed back, stood up, and barked, “Are you here?”

I was in excellent spirits and jauntily replied, “I am! That’s why I said ‘Last hand’.”

She snapped, “Well, you are over there!”

I replied, “There is no room between the tables. I’m waiting for you to leave so I can enter.”

She rolled past me, takingher huge black cloud with her, she stopped and glared at me as I started to sit down, “WHATEVER!!!” rolling her eyes towards the eye in the sky, like I was a naughty child and should be pimp slapped.

I snapped right back at her, “GET HAPPY!”

My table had a great time with that. They thought she was rude and horrible, they loved me. There’s more to the night and poker stories to tell but in the meantime, I’m playing NLH $.25-$.50 blinds on Tony G. Poker. So no more obnoxious thread right now.

Keep in mind that online poker is still alive and well, and if you want a fresh take on it – and need a great laugh – visit Michael Craig’s post for the day.

*****

Anybody know the whereabouts of Hippy Jon? Long time poker player in N. Nevada. If so, please respond to this query.

3 thoughts on “What’s a pennis?”

  1. Life is what happens when people are off doing other things in their minds….

    Your post reminded me to be happy and be present….

    You may enjoy my post about Pokey my dog buying in at a poker tournament a few days ago in a Casino…..And how the Casino staff tried to handle it…..

    Dave Dillman

    http://going2pro.blogspot.com

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