Wednesday, March 16, 2005

*continuation from previous post*

I landed in a $30-60 H game, in which the 2s was the entertainer of the year. He made more noise than a nursery full of newborns at feeding time. The game was about him, nonstop talk and backpatting – hell, he may have needed a splint for his arm just from patting himself on the back. He got Q-Q busted off in a huge pot…it was busted on the Turn…but he kept calling and making all kinds of noise.

The third hand I dealt, he was behind the Button, he put his chips in racks, and played the round. He threw in his blind and I asked him how long he was going to stay because he would have to take his chips out of the rack if he continued to play. He went on a continual, idiot rant about the ‘rack rule’ and how stupid it was and how he was going to play with his chips in racks.

Right on, pal! I told him I would call the Floor if needed or just deal him out. He then did a, “Do you guys want me to leave? I will if you want me to,” now looking at me, “See, they don’t want me to go. I can play with the racks on the table because they want me here.”

He smirked and chortled, “Call the Floorman, he will just tell you that I can stay and play with the racks.”

I called the Floor. Boba appeared. I told him the deal. Boba laughed and said, “Deal him in anyway.”

I did a, “BOBA, help me out here.”

Boba told him he could play the round. Wonderful. Now he was getting two rounds with chips in the rack and he never shut up. He informed me that he had six racks in front of him last night and that no dealer said a word to him.

I said, “So…idiots dealt to you last night.”

He informed me that I hated him. I disagreed. He continued to jam the chips into the pot, make a lot of noise and express how much I hated him.

I finally agreed, “You’re right, I do hate you!” although I was laughing when I said it.

How could I not laugh…it was ridiculous, the whole scene should have been in a movie.

He took 4-5 off and eradicated a flopped set of Queens by catching runner-runner to make a 7 high straight. The pot was so big I had to call engineering to load it up and move it over to him. He talked and gaggled and giggled and threw me a $10 chip for a toke and informed me he would leave as soon as he had his chips racked up…followed with, “You guys don’t want me to leave do you?”

Tyson was in the 10s and had the Set of Queens that bit the dust. Tyson never said a word. The 2s kept trying to look around me to Tyson and engage Tyson in conversation after he busted off the Queens. Tyson ignored him. Finally the 2s stated, “I think he hates me.”

I snorted, “I think he hates you more than I do.” *roaring laughter*

I was almost at the end of my down…thank God! He kept asking the table if they wanted him to leave and talking about how ridiculous the ‘no rack’ rule was, until he convinced a few of the idiots in the game that he should be able to play with racks on the table. Some of them stated, “She’s leaving soon.”

Damn it! Let’s hear it for the Rack Grinch! That would be me.

When the new dealer pushed in, I quietly explained to him that the 2s would need to take his chips out of the rack or be dealt out when his blind came.

I went straight to Nate and explained the situation before I pushed into my next game. During my next down, I looked over my shoulder to see all of the 2s’s chips dumped out onto the table. He came by my game about 15 minutes later and told me he cashed out on his own. I wanted to die laughing here. No shit! Cashed out on your own? Wonderful.

But the game I was in now was one of the ‘normal’ ones. A friendly little $4-8 H in which the players wanted to play poker. My, my, my…what a novel idea!

It was when I hit the next one that I wanted to have a fit. The game was $4-8 H but three of the players were making side bets of $5. What/where is the dealer’s mind that I’m pushing? This is not allowed. It might happen in the $4,000-8,000 game but it just ain’t gonna happen in a $4-8. So I had to put a stop to it and look like the bad ass.

Rewind the tape. The player in the 4s – the $200-400 game in which I had to ask for his ante each time, collapsed, did a nose dive into a chair, hit the floor – while I was on break. He was taken out by a stretcher and security while I was out of the room.

Well hell. I’m out of steam, time to sleep, and I didn’t even get into the next day. So be it! Tomorrow…