Monday, July 21, 2003

Sam G., multiplied to the nth = railbird.

It’s $60-$120 Omaha 8 or Better with a 1/4 Kill. Sam’s in the 3s on the Button.

The 8s raises pre-flop, 1s calls, Sam raises, 4s calls, 8s raises, 1s calls, Sam raises…and so it goes until the bet is capped.

The Flop has the same action.

The Turn slows down to a bet and two raises.

The River is bet by the 8s, Sam and the 4s call.

The 8s shows down an A-8 for low and an 8 high flush. Sam shows a Queen high flush and they split the pot.

Sam starts chortling and chuckling, “Did you see what he capped it on? If they play like that in Jersey, I’m moving there.” He could be heard three tables away and he didn’t stop laughing.

The 8s flushed and raised as soon as the bet came to him in the next hand. stating, “It’s what you want, right?”

Sam kept guffawing like a lout that found the Goose that laid Golden Egg. Sure, we know what happened there.

Sam never shut up, jabbering long hard and continuously about how great a player he was, and intermittently he threw in, “Anybody got any money? That’s a game over there,” he nodded at table 7 where it was three handed and they were playing mixed games with mixed limits.

In other words, he was wondering if anyone would jump at the opportunity to put him in the game. No one bit.

Sam kept talking about what a great player he is even though he had very few chips in front of him. He finally pushed out a $1 chip and said, “If this is the only chip I had, forever, I’d still be the best player!”

He looked around at the table and finished with, “You just don’t get it do you?”

He went for a walk to the Sports Book and, this is the limit where every player gets a hand as long as they haven’t missed their blind, I dealt him in.

Double A was sitting in the 2s and he slow stalled with his hand, looked over his shoulder to see if Sam was coming yet, shuffled his cards around, look at them again, and looked over his shoulder again to see if Sam was coming.

I said, “Don’t hold it up too long.”

He looked over his shoulder one more time and finally threw his hand in. While I really like Double A, I just don’t see this at all, trying to make sure Sam gets a hand when all he wants to do is criticize everyone’s play and act like he’s the only one entitled to win.

Sam came back at the end of the hand. The 8s made four 8’s and hogged the pot. Double A told Sam he tried to make sure Sam got back in time for the hand but he couldn’t wait any longer, the players were all mad at him.

Sam berated him with, “I don’t believe you. You didn’t do anything for me.”

When Sam saw the Quads, he said, “Thank you, dealer.”

I ignored him. He repeated it. I asked, “What do you think I did?”

“You didn’t let me get back to the hand and I didn’t get trapped. If you think I’m sincere in thanking you, you should say, ‘You’re welcome’.”

I never said a word.

Sam went broke in a hand. He went to the Cage and came back with a $500 chip. I dealt him in and told him that was a short buy-in for the game.

He stared at me.

I stared back and finished with, “You get one short buy-in.”

As I finished the deal, he did this “Whau-gah-ck!” kind of thing that sounded like he was trying to cough up a lugie and puke and said, “They moved the garbage.”

Of course he was sending all of this in my direction and while I would’ve liked to have said, “No…they didn’t!” and let him figure out he was it, instead I said quietly, “Grow up, Sam.”

He informed me that he didn’t mind me telling him it was a short buy-in but he didn’t want to hear the personal comments.

See…it’s ok for him to imply that I’m the garbage that he wanted to spit in but I’m not allowed to make a PERSONAL comment about him.

He was all-in in the next hand, it was my last one, and on the River, the 9s bet $160, and Sam called $100 of it. They were the only two players left and I had left their bet on 6th street in front of them. I pushed $60 back to the 9s and Sam wanted to needle me. “How much did you give him?”

Me, “$60.”

“How much do I have in front of me?”

Double A interjected, “She’s right. It’s right.”

I reached over and stacked up Sam’s chips and said, “$250,” then I stacked up the 9s’s chips and said, “$250.”

Sam sat there, Double A said, “It’s ok, it’s right, Linda.”

Calm as a cucumber, I said, “I know…it’s just a little game we have to play.”

The 9s turned over his hand and hogged the pot. I pushed out of the box and told the incoming dealer that the 3s had already had a short buy-in. You may think I’m being malicious with this but it’s the rule and what I’m supposed to do.

There are no short buy-ins allowed in any game under $10-$20. A short buy-in in a bigger game is allowed only once in 8 hours and it must be half the minimum buy-in.

A few hours later Sam was sitting in a $15-$30 Holdem game two tables ahead in my line up. I would’ve dealt to him again, but he was walking and had left about $12 on the table. He’d been gone awhile. When I gave an absent button to his stack, the 3s said, “Sammy’s not coming back, might as well pick him up.”

“Not until he has two white buttons and 15 minutes,” was my reply.

Sam was stalking and walking the room, up to Table 1, hanging out, back down, looking around. Not sure why because he’s still the best player on Earth and he still had a chip in front of him…go figure!